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| Blogs > rm_longliner002 > longliner002 My Blog |
New Year Quotes
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New Year Quotes New Year Quotes An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. - Bill Vaughan Then sing, young hearts that are full of cheer, With never a thought of sorrow; The old goes out, but the glad young year Comes merrily in tomorrow. - Emily Miller The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to. - P.J. O'Rourke Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true. - Lord Tennyson, 1850 We meet today To thank Thee for the era done, And Thee for the opening one. - John Greenleaf Whittier Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. - Bill Vaughan Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average. Which means you've met your New Year's resolution. - Jay Leno A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. - Unknown The only way to spend New Year's Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears. - W.H. Auden KISS AND SLAP A young Technician and his General Manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to Wichita. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother. After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young tech are interested in each because they are giving each other "looks." Soon the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch black. There is a sound of the smack of a kiss followed by the sound of the smack of a slap. When the train emerges from the tunnel, the four sit there without saying a word. The grandmother is thinking to herself: "It was very brash for that young man to kiss my granddaughter, but I'm glad she slapped him." The General manager is setting there thinking: "I didn't know the young tech was brave enough to kiss the girl, but I sure wish she hadn't missed him when she slapped and hit me!" The young woman was sitting and thinking: "I'm glad the guy kissed me, but I wish my grandmother had not slapped him!" The young tech sat there with a satisfied smile on his face. He thought to himself: "Life at Boeing is good. How often does a guy have the chance to kiss a beautiful girl and slap his General manager all at the same time!!!!! THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY IN FOOTBALL 1. The hole closed on him before he could penetrate it. 2. He came at his blind side and got him from behind. 3. He's off to the sidelines for a quick blow. 4. It's a game of inches. 5. That hole was so big, you could drive a truck through it. 6. When you get down in this area, you just gotta start pounding. 7. He's gonna feel that one tomorrow. 8. He found his tight end. 9. End around. 10. He had to stretch to get it in. 11. He gets penetration in the backfield. 12. He blows them off (at the line). 13. He bangs it in. 14. He could go all the way. 15. He gets it off just in time. 16. He goes deep. 17. He found a hole and slid through it. 18. He pounds it in. 19. He beats them off (the line). 20. He's got great hands. TALENTED A man is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt. Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of the females thighs. To his delight, he realises she has gone without underwear. The blonde realises he is staring and enquires, "Are you looking at my pussy?" "Yes, I'm sorry" replies the man and promises to avert his eyes. "It's quite alright," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll make it blow a kiss to you." Sure enough the pussy blows him a kiss. The man, who is getting really interested, enquires what else the wonder pussy can do. "I can also make it wink," says the woman. The man stares in amazement as the pussy winks at him. "Come and sit next to me," suggests the woman, patting the seat. The man moves over and is asked, "Would you like to stick a couple of fingers in?" Stunned, the man replies, "F*** me! Can it whistle as well?"  |
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12/31/2005 6:46 am |
Hmmm, I think I like football now  , lol
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glad you enjoyed it
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