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| Blogs > 49AK > Out of the Ordinary |
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More From the I took part of the day off yesterday, in order to protect my bones and vehicle from the dangers of icy, wet streets and parking lots. I made the mistake of using my new-found free time to get on Facebook and poke around on there. I found an old, old friend that I had grown up with. She was someone that I had quite a crush on (and I am sure that regular readers of my blog will point out that I probably still do have a crush on her). I've written about her at least twice, here and here. I've never slept with her - at least, not in the sex sense of the word. But I did have an interesting close call once... one that I didn't realize was happening. She went to college about three hours from where I lived. In the summer she would come home, and we would make a night out of it occasionally, visiting a local raw bar and downing a few pitchers of some very inexpensive beer. My best (male) friend at the time was the third in this group, and we regularly had fun together, the three of us. In the fall, she would head off to school, and my friend and I decided to make an early January road trip to see her one weekend. Her school was in the mountains, and while snow was relatively rare where I lived, a few hour drive into the Appalachians was like traveling into another world - one where winter hung around for a couple months at a time. Needless to say, beer and twenty-five years have made most of the details hazy, but a few stand out. Her school was in a stereotypical college town - one where the largest employer was the college, and the second largest was the aggregate of all of the bars and taverns in town. We got there early on Saturday, and immediately embarked on a pub crawl through the hilly, snowy streets. One stop was a college dive, the next a more conservative kind of place. She seemed to know someone at every stop, whether it was a bartender or just a friend. At one stop, the three of us were sitting at a table, and were at the end of a pitcher. The object of my desires looks towards the door, and immediately hops up and runs to the bar and orders another pitcher, and then greets one of her girlfriends at the door. The two of them come back with the fresh pitcher in hand and another glass - and we were now transformed into a party of four. Introductions were made all around, and our new friend was happy to share our beer, but she seemed a little down. My gal friend seemed determined to help her our of her blues, and kept her glass at least half full. We visited for about fifteen minutes, and my gal friend says to the other woman, "So, Jenny, would you like to sleep with one of these fine gentlemen tonight?" The other woman was not swayed (or perhaps, not drunk enough), and still seemed intent on pining for some guy she had a hankering for. True confession: At the time, I had no idea what was going on. Had you asked me at that moment, I would have told you that it was about making sure that we were sleeping in a bed, rather than on the floor in a dorm room. I had no idea she was trying to get us laid. So when we finished the pitcher, Jenny went her way, and the three musketeers went on to the next place, in search of more beer-induced fog. Eventually we ended up in her dorm room and the three of us crashed. I remember lying awake for a good portion of the night, wanting my friend so badly, but having to lie just so, to hide my erection. I think that my gal friend secretly wanted my traveling partner, rather than me... and had things played out as I thought they might, it might actually have been worse for me than it turned out... but who knows. Once, several years later, I was out with her (this time, just the two of us), and I decided to say something to her about how badly I wanted her. I was terribly nervous, and my heart was pounding in my chest. I had no idea what to say to her... So I reached my arm out to her, and said, "Take my pulse." She put her finger on my wrist, and after about three or four seconds, she exclaims, "Oh my God, are you OK?" She thought a twenty-three year old was having a heart attack. I told her I was fine... but it allowed me to break the ice and confess to her what was going through my mind. Then she really blew my mind. In the sweetest, most compassionate way one can let another down, she says, "I can't... but I know that there was a time when we both wanted to, but didn't..." THERE WAS? WHEN DID YOU WANT TO? WHERE WAS I? The only thing I can think of was that night at the bar a couple years before. Either that, or I was really so clueless that I had no idea what was going on. None. Zero. Zip. That was entirely possible, but I doubt it. Well, OK, maybe I was clueless. |
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1/16/2009 9:32 pm |
In reading your story I thought perhaps it was harder on you finding out that there was once a possibility then never having know that one existed. Almost like love lost, but never really captured. Yes...I'm here to tell you that guys unknowingly can completely miss all the clues that a female is interested in them but in fairness it goes both ways too. Thanks for sharing your story. 
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